Love (and Life) in the Time of Coronavirus

A San Francisco Police car roaming the near-empty streets of Union Square in San Francisco (Photo by Raymond Virata)

A San Francisco Police car roaming the near-empty streets of Union Square in San Francisco (Photo by Raymond Virata)

San Francisco Bay Area, March 13 - Wow. The world has certainly changed in the last three months!

I was in Manila when Taal Volcano erupted in January of this year.  Houses were destroyed and people and animals were evacuated to safer ground.  As the ashes dropped in Metro Manila, it was common to see people wearing face masks as they went to work.  The outpouring of support for the Taal victims and residents was overwhelming, and it was very enlightening to see the “better” side of people as they helped others.

I got back to San Francisco just when people in Wuhan, China started exhibiting symptoms of the virus.  I remember thinking:  It’s Chinese New Year, and everyone will be celebrating the event in some form or other – reunions, parades, shopping, eating at crowded restaurants, taking vacations in countries that do not close for Chinese New Year.  Everyone and everywhere will be infected.

According to LiveScience, the coronavirus or COVID-19 first appeared in a 55-year- old individual from Hubei province in China as early as November 17, 2019.  In December 2019, doctors began to see more cases in Wuhan, Hubei.  At that time only 27 cases were reported.  By the end of December, 180 individuals were infected.  As of March 13, 2020, there were nearly 148,000 cases globally, and 81,000 cases in China, with cases on every continent except Antartica. 

Some countries are in lockdown mode, restricting movements of people.  In the Philippines, there is a curfew from 8:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. in the province of Laguna.  In the U.S., we are under a national state of emergency, and “foreigners” from Europe are not permitted to enter.  Some states have instituted more draconian measures to limit the spread of the virus.  As of this writing, there are 2,000 coronavirus cases in the U.S.  Every day thousands more are added to the infected list, and the death list as well.

Everything seems so surreal, like in a “Twilight Zone” movie.   The most at-risk group is people like me – 60 years old and above, especially those who already have an underlying sickness like diabetes, cancer, hypertension, etc.  Of course, I am afraid to get COVID-19, but I am more afraid to pass it on to others who are of frail health.

We are such social animals that practicing social distancing can be very difficult and challenging.   My son has to constantly remind me that where I want to go is not necessary now, and he can get me whatever I need.  The roles have been reversed:  I am the stubborn parent/child who needs to be told to stay at home and not go out.  He is the child/parent who wants to protect and care for his mother.

I still take short trips to the grocery, drug store, dry cleaners, gym and parlor (my gym just closed).  Not only is it good to see and be outside of my house, but I need these breaks to keep me sane.  Just like I have been cooking every day, when I haven’t been doing so in more than a year.  Cooking makes me feel “real,” like doing something mundane and ordinary, and that’s why I need to go to the grocery every week for fresh supplies, if I can find them.  (Yesterday, the grocery was out of cabbage!)  My husband is happy that he is no longer eating leftover food I bring home from my lunches and dinners.

Empty shelves at Bay Area supermarkets and grocery stores (Photo by Raymond Virata)

Empty shelves at Bay Area supermarkets and grocery stores (Photo by Raymond Virata)

I have ordered two 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzles and downloaded some books and games to keep me occupied.  My son dropped off another puzzle with 2,000 pieces.  Okay, now we know what will fill my days!

The other night I had to go to San Francisco and it took me only 20 minutes from Burlingame. No traffic, as most people were working from home.  I have also closed my office for the next few weeks and instituted procedures on how my assistant and I can work from home.  He takes public transportation to go to work; therefore, he is exposed to a lot of people, and then he comes in contact with me in the office, and I don’t know how my immune system is.  After all, I belong to the high-risk group.  You get the idea.

A mural of climate activist Greta Thunberg overlooking the once-busy streets of San Francisco (Photo by Raymond Virata)

A mural of climate activist Greta Thunberg overlooking the once-busy streets of San Francisco (Photo by Raymond Virata)

Now is the time to binge on television shows and movies that you didn’t have time to watch before.  There are so many of them that the challenge lies in choosing the better ones that will not waste your time.

I have checked on friends who are older and frailer, and who may not have the familial support system nearby to see if they needed anything.  We can complain all we want, but there are people who are actually in need of help and may be dying.

I also think about the people who have lost their jobs or will lose their jobs, or who need to work.  Or people who have lost their retirement funds due to the stock market collapse.  Or the health care workers who have put their lives on the line to care for the sick.  I hope they will all be okay.  I search online for acts of kindness to lift my spirits, and pray that goodness will prevail.

Some people joke that one year after today, there will be more births (and maybe more divorces) with these lockdowns and isolations. 


For me, the hardest thing about self-isolation is not being able to see, hug and kiss my children and grandchildren.

It is also allergy season, and I wake up each morning with sniffles and watery eyes.  I don’t go out till late morning, until the allergy subsides for fear of stares.  I am after all, Asian (Chinese-Filipino, to be exact) and I do not want to be discriminated upon.  I patronized a few of my favorite Asian establishments these past weeks and found them to be empty.  They were so happy to serve customers as many of them rely on tips for supplemental income.

This afternoon I went to the bank to wire some funds for our grantees in the Philippines.  The teller told me that people are withdrawing large amounts of cash, so they have limited withdrawals to $10,000 per person.  Did you see the long lines of people waiting to buy guns and ammunition in parts of the country?

In church, they have stopped drinking the wine from the chalice during Communion and emptied the holy water fonts.  We are advised not to hold hands during the Our Father, and not to shake hands at the Sign of Peace.  Elderly, sick people are recommended to stay at home.  In the Philippines, several television shows and websites offer the Sunday Mass, so there is no need to congregate in churches.  Even the Holy Week festivities in the provinces, like re-enacting the crucifixion, has been canceled.   And if you want to receive Communion, you can ask the priest to come to you.

For me, the hardest thing about self-isolation is not being able to see, hug and kiss my children and grandchildren.  And thank God for technology, I am able to at least FaceTime and talk to them.

I wake up each morning with a sense of fear: Will I be next?  But we must keep up hope that we will survive this.  The priest’s sermon last Sunday said that social distancing does not mean we close our hearts and not reach out to those in need.  Now, more than ever, is the time to help each other.  Maybe it will still unite all of us.

Stay safe, everyone.